Before I speak

I love prayer. Anyone who knows me well knows that prayer is a passion of mine. I consider it a privilege to be able to talk freely and honestly to God about everything in my life; my fears, doubts, longings, desires, failures, victories, friends, family, petitions for others and myself ... oh, the list never ends!

I am so blessed that the Lord has called me to use certain gifts that He has given me to honor Him and bless others. This morning He really convicted and challenged me about how I use those gifts ... and when. What He taught me today is that in order to use those gifts effectively, I need to make sure of one thing: that I spend much time before Him in prayer before I even open my mouth.

No surprise to those of you who happen to read my blog occasionally, God brought this to my attention through my daily devotion from Tozer. Here it is.

April 4

Prayer: Long Before the Lord

But whenever Moses went in before the Lord to speak with Him, he would take the veil off until he came out; and he would come out and speak to the children of Israel whatever he had been commanded. --Exodus 34:34

It is written of Moses that he "went in before the Lord to speak with him...and he came out, and spake unto the children of Israel." This is the Biblical norm from which we depart to our own undoing and to the everlasting injury of the souls of men. No man has any moral right to go before the people who has not first been long before the Lord. No man has any right to speak to men about God who has not first spoken to God about men. [Emphasis mine] And the prophet of God should spend more time in the secret place praying than he spends in the public place preaching....

One swallow does not make a spring nor one hot day a summer; nor will a few minutes of frantic praying before service bring out the tender buds or make the flowers to appear on the earth. The field must be soaked in sunshine over a long period before it will give forth its treasures. The Christian's heart must be soaked in prayer before the true spiritual fruits begin to grow. The Root of the Righteous, 121-122.

"Lord, it seems like much of what we've been emphasizing all year requires that we slow down from our frantic pace. It takes great spiritual discipline to 'spend more time in the secret place praying than we spend in the public place preaching.' Quiet my heart today, slow me down I pray. Amen."

The Cry of a Soul on its way Up

While I'm still processing so much from our latest church journey called "Consumed", God brought the thought back to me of a prayer I publically displayed, boldly and brightly:

Less of me, more of YOU.

These are the words that I painted on the wall in the Prayer Experience. It's not only a reminder of when I scrawled out that prayer on the wall with bold, colorful sharpies, words lost in a landscape of thousands of other prayers of gratitude and love and healing and surrender - but a personal reminder that He is delighting in me that I am longing for more of Him. Perhaps this shall be my personal mantra, my personal prayer for this very season that I am in right now. Less of me, more of YOU.

So ... my daily Tozer devotion is emailed to me at 1:30 a.m. every day. I had a bad night of insomnia so I decided it would probably be a good thing to spend some time reading him and spend some quiet time in prayer and contemplation. Tozer has a way of cutting straight to the core and it's one of the things that I love so much about his way of teaching: 'Here it is', he seems to be saying, 'plain as day, now what are you going to do about it?'

It really hit home and spoke volumes to me this morning. I figured I'd go ahead and share it with the rest of you.

March 28
Pastoral Ministry: Just a Huckster

Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. --Philippians 3:13-14

Some young preacher will study until he has to get thick glasses to take care of his failing eyesight because he has an idea he wants to become a famous preacher. He wants to use Jesus Christ to make him a famous preacher. He's just a huckster buying and selling and getting gain. They will ordain him and he will be known as Reverend and if he writes a book, they will make him a doctor. And he will be known as Doctor; but he's still a huckster buying and selling and getting gain. And when the Lord comes back, He will drive him out of the temple along with the other cattle.

We can use the Lord for anything--or try to use Him. But what I'm preaching and what Paul taught and what was brought down through the years and what gave breath to the modern missionary movement that you and I know about and belong to was just the opposite: "O, God, we don't want anything You have, we want You." That's the cry of a soul on its way up. ~A. W. Tozer Success and the Christian, 29.

"Lord, give us that hunger to know You; deliver us from the pride that makes us want to use You. Let me pray today with John, 'He must increase, but I must decrease.' Amen."

Tozer on Failure & Success

This was in my inbox this morning. I'll let Tozer speak for himself.

October 1

Failure and Success: Paralysis From Past Mistakes

For as the heavens are high above the earth, so great is His mercy toward those who fear Him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us. --Psalm 103:11-12

Do not let any of the things of the world or past mistakes paralyze your hearts. I believe there are Christians who have allowed some of their past mistakes to paralyze them. You were so bright and cheerful in your spiritual life once, and then you made some tragic mistake or had something happen to you. You got out of it somehow, and prayed and wept your way out of it. But it did something to you, and now you cannot lick it. Past wrongs that have been done to you, past failures, times you thought you were going to win and did not, or present sins or discouragement -- these things are not mental at all. They are deeper than that; they are subconscious, and they prevent us from believing.

I most urgently exhort you, and I trust God Almighty to deliver you; to sponge that out of your spirit; to sponge that out of your heart so you are not hindered by unbelief. Rut, Rot or Revival: The Condition of the Church, pp. 162-163

"Lord, I'm surely not the only one who desparately needs this reminder this morning. So many of us struggle with past sins, failures, or hurts. I pray for all of my fellow-servants who need deliverance, who need to have the past sponged out of their spirits and hearts. Amen."

Revival: Blessing on Our Terms

On Wednesday night, our pastor challenged us to run -- run as God ran to the prodigal son, run as Jesus runs to embrace and love those who are lost, run to share Jesus with those we know who don't know Him. There was a huge burst of applause and cheering as everyone promised to take up the challenge.

And then service was over.

This morning, I woke up and opened my devotion from A.W. Tozer. Once again, Tozer stopped me in my tracks and sent me to my knees. Here it is:

Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me."
-Matthew 16:24

Here is what grieves me, and I believe this also grieves the Holy Spirit: My hearers rise to this call emotionally, but they will not confirm it by a corresponding change in their way of life. Their goodness is like the morning clouds-by 9:00 o'clock the sun has burnt off the fog. This is what happens to many people's good intentions. They rise emotionally to an urgent message that we become a New Testament church, that we become a model church, that we have the order of the New Testament and the power of the Holy Spirit in order that we might worship, work and witness. Emotionally they rise to it, but they will not confirm their emotions by corresponding changes in their way of life.

They want to be blessed by God, but they want God to bless them on their terms. They look pensively to God for victory, but they will not bring their giving into line. They will not practice family prayer, rushing off without it. They will not take time for secret prayer and will not forgive those who have wronged them. They will not seek to be reconciled to those with whom they have quarreled. They will not pick up their crosses and say, "Jesus, I my cross have taken, all to leave and follow Thee." Rut, Rot or Revival: The Condition of the Church, 146-147.

"Lord, may my desire for You rise above emotions. I do want to be blessed of You, both personally and in my ministry. I commit myself this morning to a willingness to take my cross and follow You-and to take the necessary action to come on Your terms. Amen."

100 Pianos

Every morning, I get a devotional in my mailbox by Tozer. I became a big Tozer reader when I was living and serving at Jesus People USA -- Glenn Kaiser turned me on to his writings. This guy doesn't pull punches; he cuts to the quick.

This morning's devotion really hit home with me. As most of you know, I am part of a "seeker-driven" church and it is our desire that people will find community in each other as they seek relationship with Jesus and will grow in both community and with Christ as a result.

This morning, Tozer showed me a beautiful picture of how true community comes about. I thought I'd share it with you.

Happy Monday. :)

The Church: 100 Pianos

..that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You,that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me. --John 17:21

Someone may fear that we are magnifying private religion out of all proportion, that the "us" of the New Testament is being displaced by a selfish "I." Has it ever occurred to you that one hundred pianos all tuned to the same fork are automatically tuned to each other? They are of one accord by being tuned, not to each other, but to another standard to which each one must individually bow. So one hundred worshippers meeting together, each one looking away to Christ, are in heart nearer to each other than they could possibly be were they to become "unity" conscious and turn their eyes away from God to strive for closer fellowship. Social religion is perfected when private religion is purified. The body becomes stronger as its members become healthier. The whole church of God gains when the members that compose it begin to seek a better and a higher life. The Pursuit of God, page 90.

"Lord, let this start with me. Give me a closer walk with You today. Then as a leader enable me to encourage others as well, individually, so that all to whom I minister might be in harmony as we individually are close to You. Amen."